As we look at the pictures from Uvalde, Texas; Buffalo, New York;. and other mass shooting sites, we’re having agonized conversations. It seems inconceivable that “the other side” could look at those same photos, yet reach different conclusions about their meanings. I’ve been researching how liberals and conservatives experience talking across our divide. Three things stand out: we all tend to experience those conversations the same way, we all try hard to avoid them and each cross-divide interaction adds to overall conflict dynamics in our country – both positively and negatively. We all avoid talking to the other side for similar reasons: the other person won’t listen, will get too emotional and there would be no point. Essentially, we’re united in how uncomfortable these exchanges make us feel. If we do engage, we often do so aggressively. We usually don’t ask questions to try to understand the other person, but instead, throw out statements of identity and values (“Well, I’m a…